Creating CO2 : Being Alive

Dilemma?

The moment i got off the cab, there was this old lady standing right there smiling at me.
At first I was thinking she wanted to take the cab and i gladly held the door open for her and moved away, but things turned out unexpected.

She started asking me for money and started holding onto my wind breaker. I told her i didnt have any, the only note I had

was RMB100, but she was persistant. Kept holding while we waited at the traffic lights to cross the streets. We kept ignoring

her all the way, but the old lady seems determined to get some cash out of me ~_~

The lights turned green and we crossed over, she kept holding and begging while we were unrelented. Till once we got over,

she turned over and with a smile equally deadly as her being sweet, she told her to let go of my jacket.

The old lady was shocked and gave way, walking back she cursed me to die of hunger.

I was cursed anyway, my unrequianted love.

But now i'm on my road to recovery lor =)
Yeah 1 more day before boss comes back and i hope i could dive back to finish my work...Finish it.

Gota make prep to visit SK or andy, to heal my broken heart? keke ;-)
I know SK's busy w work n taking care of his wifie n might not have the time at all for me

Her bf would be here around 18th, so i would have to make myself scarce in 12 days time
Sis n everyone else is asking me to go back soon, i was thinking of roaming abit more before i go back.

I would say this tender we'll flop, a big mistake but very gd experience for me.
Why gd experience? It allowed me to see how cold she could get in theway she treats the old lady, not that it matters, my ex also could get very cold ~_~ and guess everyone knows how it felt hehe

Not really that hard to deal w a cold ger la, quite fun also if u put ur heart to it ;p but i'm not a smooth talker and would only irk ppl due to the wrong choice or words, so even with the correct attitude it would be incurr her deadly words x_x

Hmmm... It maybe a gd idea to start irking her ;-) keke

I know alot of u would wan me to do tt rite? nasty le u all ;p
I'll be ready when I'm ready to move on lor...

A nice quote i saw the other day...

"In order to prevent changes in your life, you would need to make changes yourself"

Or something like tt la ;p kekeke So i would guess I need some changes for myself then
Just duno how to "change" properly. Sometimes I get abit unstable, I would say so myself.

she wana see wat i wrote for this blog... i didnt wan her to see n affect my mood to write.

Now listening to "Hurricane"...

It is a relapse... Saw she had an email from her bf. "Good morning Darling :)" I only saw the title...
It made me feel bad lor, jealous? Really duno but it certainly felt worser than the chill i'm feeling now
And then her mobile's SMS tone rang, mot prob her bf SMS her lor

"Amazing"

Its no big secret la, duno how to continue writing this blog lor.

Getting over the edge myself now, imersing myself in MP3.
Lying to her infront of me now, pretending to smile when it hurts...
Totally ignoring her on "Knocking on Heaven's door"
She asked on where to go tonight, but i didnt really wana talk... especially to her now
Gota ask for backup x_x Stupid dog, where are u when i needed u?

Nasty, she's mad coz she thought i meant she was very cold to me...at last she's left me alone...
Anyway she'll be reading this post sometime later tonight

Somehow her leaving in pettiness, took away all the ill desired feelings from my heart.
Not sure if its good or bad, I just sit here continue writing about... nothing

"Everything I do"

It's really stupid lor, just an email only can turn my mood upside-down.
There's a chance I'm gona stay in bed tonight

Think some of the ill vibes has went over to her... =(
I dont wan her to feel sad, this is my feeling not hers.

She's looking for some inspiration to reply to her email n i wasnt able to provide it to her.

"Unbreak my heart"

Duno if she's jestering when she said tt, but i really dont wish for her to know what i'm feeling.
Gota recover if i wana to enjoy this last night of freedom...

Ok she's ok liao, no need worry abt her. Feeling tired, head hurts, heartaches.

Phew... Lucky she's ok liao... I'm physically tired, so very tired.

"K lor 不要出咯,反正外面很冷吗!" She's being sarcastic...

kook さんの投稿 @ 6:31 午後